So what's mine?

The more I think about it, the more I know I need to change my outlook on life, but I'm not sure how. I got married almost a year ago, which was and continues to be, fantastic, but then I lost my job last August and work has been few and far between since then.

I didn't realize it at the time, but a more-than-healthy significant portion of my identity was wrapped up in that job. It defined me, as what I did for a living, as a title and as a person. I know in the most important schemes, I didn't deserve to lose my job, but a voice inside me, lurking even in the best times, constantly reminds me that hubris is a very bad thing and I was certainly proud of that job. Maybe too proud.

I know that when/if I ever get another job, I'll long for the nights of staying up late and waking up without the alarm, but the reality of that existence, is that it's lonely. I spent almost every day, alone, without much to do. The house is clean, the laundry is done, and the fridge is full. Everyone is at work, and I'm left here, staring at the walls, left to my thoughts, which is a bad place to be.

I want to be happier, I really do and I know it's all tied in my feeling useful and accomplished, which is what working gave me and now that I don't have that, I don't know where to go from here. I don't know how to recreate that feeling of having a purpose without anything to do.