A Delta-Don't

Delta no longer lets you fly standby. I learned this today when trying to change from a 4pm flight to the redeye from LA. Not only would I have to pay 50 bucks, double the charge from the usual $25 but then an additional THOUSAND DOLLARS for the honor of spending my snoozing hours in an 18-inch seat contained within a metal tube, hurtling through space and time.

The Delta Lady also called me "sir" several times. When I finally pointed out she was, you know, wrong, in the time it took her to get mad and defensive, she was only too happy to inform me the price of the ticket was now eleven hundred dollars, thus bringing the final cost of the trip up to almost $1600, nearly 4 times what I originally paid. More than the current going rate for first class. And if I "miss" my 4pm flight and even try to go standby/cry my way onboard the redeye (which has maaaaany seats open, btw), they'll force me to buy a new ticket which "will be a big problem for you MA'AM, as you're not willing to pay for it, and will be at least TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS BY THEN so I don't know HOW you think you'll be getting home."

So, yeah. No standby. I hate you Delta.

(epilogue: I got the meeting changed to the morning so it's all a moot point. After all that, it's definitely a double-Nexium kind of day. Gah.)